Years ago I attended a presentation at work when I noticed the person next to me was making little tally marks on his notepad. By the end of the meeting he got up to 17.
Afterwards I asked him what he was doing. He said he was counting the number of times the speaker used the word “okay.”
Filler words are a common problem, and while the attention to them is in some ways overblown, like any repetitive verbal or physical tic they can be distracting. And in a world of easy distraction why give your audience one more excuse to tune out?
So let’s look at filler words and other common speaker habits and how you can overcome them.
Here’s the Truth About Filler Words
A lot of speaker coaches have a zero-tolerance policy on filler words such as “uh,” “um,” “like,” “basically,” “okay,” “right,” and “you know.” Especially in so-called “formal” speech like a presentation.
But most of us don’t regularly find ourselves on a ballroom stage delivering keynotes to 3,000 people. We’re more likely gathered in a conference room with colleagues, where a presentation should sound more like natural conversation than formal oration.
There’s even evidence that filler words are the sign of a thoughtful, conscientious speaker, carefully gathering their thoughts, weighing their words and tempering their assertions.
To me, filler words are only a problem when they become excessive. When you or others start noticing them, that’s a time to tamp them down.
How to Reduce Your Filler Words
There are lots of ways to identify the words you overuse. Microsoft Teams has a speaker coach function that can point them out, and there are apps and AI tools that do the same thing. Or you can just record yourself speaking and review the video or transcript.
Pay special attention to any Q&A portions where you’re more likely to be thinking on your feet. Years ago I noticed in webinars that I started every answer to a question with the word “well.”
If you find you lean heavily on certain words, try these solutions:
- Put a Post-it note on your computer screen with the offending word crossed out. (This is how I addressed my “well” problem.)
- Practice replacing the filler word with a pause, then eventually close up that space.
- Appoint an accountability partner to help you monitor the issue.
- Try a bit of aversion therapy by wearing a rubber band on your wrist and snapping it when you relapse.
How to Correct Physical Tics
Physical tics are also common, whether it’s a repetitive gesture, restlessly shifting your weight from one foot to the other or constantly pacing back-and-forth.
And some are a physical/verbal hybrid, like speaking too quickly, too quietly or in a monotone.
Whatever the issue, here’s a solution I picked up from my former second career as an actor.
When we rehearsed monologues, our instructor would have us push the physical, vocal and emotional boundaries of our performance by practicing in a variety of ways, such as:
- Angry, distraught, giddy;
- With the intention to punish, seduce or beg;
- By making ourselves “big” physically in gesture and movement, then shrinking into ourselves.
Going over the top helped push us beyond our self-imposed barriers and ultimately discover the right balance of tone and physicality.
I adapted this approach for a method I call “push the opposite extreme to find the mean.” So for instance, if you talk too fast, practice speaking as slow as molasses. Too quietly? Shout it to the hilltops. Are you too fidgety? Stand frozen like a statue.
By taking it to the opposite extreme, you open your mind and body to other possibilities. And when you “snap back” you land on a place closer to the mean — a “new normal” that’s neither too much of one thing or the other.
The point of all this is not to change yourself into someone you’re not, but to bring out the very best version of you. That way your energy, conviction and ideas shine through, free of unnecessary distraction.
[A version of this post originally ran in PRSA’s Strategies & Tactics.]